It’s no news that when you are in a relationship, you would want to make it work, especially when you have a partner you really like.
You probably already have an ‘it’ couple you admire and you probably feel they are the best thing since sliced bread (lol)
Bottom line is the grass isn’t greener on the other side, the other side just mows their lawn and waters it.
Look at it this way, you know that sneakers, outfit or gadget you really love, you see how careful you keep it, how you take care of it and don’t let anyone misuse it, well, relationships are almost like that.
Those couples you admire, who kiss and hold hands even after 2,3 years, it’s not rocket science, and most times it’s not ‘charm’ either. They just work through whatever is thrown at them and have come to understand each other.
Over time, I compiled a list of things one can do to keep their relationship strong and I hope it helps you.
• Understand Each Other: This cannot be over emphasized,you need to know your partner, study them in and out. What’s their love language and what is yours? Your partner may not be one to say I Love You all the time, their way of showing it may be in form of giving gifts, yours may be in form of helping out with chores and the rest (You’ll understand this better if you know the 5 love languages).
Know your partner enough to know if they want to be left alone when they’re angry or they need to talk it out that instant. Things like this would prevent a lot of squabbles.
• Communication: If you feel a certain kind of way, speak up. Don’t hold things to heart. Learn to talk about the littlest of things from how your day went, your annoying coworker, to why that thing he/she said offended you, why you feel sad or down or weird whether it’s about your relationship or life in general. There’s nothing quite like feeling like you can talk to your partner about anything at all.
• Don’t Compare: Just Don’t. No one likes to be compared to another human being. Don’t compare them to your ex, or your friends boyfriend or girlfriend. Everyone is different and unique in their own way and it includes in the way they love someone. The bitter truth is that the grass is not always greener on the other side. Comparison can sometimes build resentment. Focus on their positives instead and what they do that makes you ‘happy’ that your ‘ex’ didn’t do.
• Don’t Try to Change Them: Your friend’s boyfriend posts her pictures 10 times a week and suddenly you’re nagging your man to do the same, forgetting that he has never been a social media person or one to do stuffs like that. You could just mention that you would like it if he posts your pictures sometimes and not badgering him into doing it because your friend’s boyfriend does.
• Keep the Relationship fun: Because you both are comfortable with each other does not mean you shouldn’t have pillow fights once in a while, act goofy, ride on a Ferris wheel, surprise him/her or with dinner or lunch or breakfast.
• Try Not to Let Misunderstandings Drag: When you both have issues, remember its you both against the issue and not you both against each other. It’s not the time to start keeping malice or entertaining other people as a means to forget your partner. It’s a time to solve issues amicably.
• Support Each Other: Be your partner’s biggest cheerleader, whether it’s a new job, or project or business, even educationally. Be there to support and encourage them, whether it’s emotionally, financially or otherwise.
• Appreciate Each Other: Learn to appreciate each other no matter, even if it’s just for being there.
• Have a life outside your relationship: The fact that you are in a relationship does not mean you won’t have friends, you won’t spend time with them and even your family. You should have a happy life outside your relationship so you won’t depend solely on your relationship to make you happy.
• Spend Quality Time Together: Whether it’s watching a movie together, or cooking together or just laying down and talking with them about different things, it’s very vital to spend time with your partner.
Basically, all these things don’t mean that your relationship will perfect but to a large extent, it will help you have a relatively stress free and happy relationship.
Wink’s Corner
