As a student, before you go into details about anything you want to write about, you must at least define the terms associated and that is what I will do today. Peer pressure occurs when an individual feels as though they need to do the same things as people their own age or in their social group to be liked or accepted.
Most of the time, peer pressure doesn’t come through as positive. In fact, it is always associated with negative things. Your peer is someone who is in the same age group as you and if you ever feel like you need to be a certain way or do a certain thing to fit in or make them like you, I tell you, you are not welcome there. The simple truth is, if your friends or people you call your friends like you at all, they wouldn’t ever want you to do anything that isn’t right just to fit in.
I know of a friend while we were growing up. She used to go clubbing and sneak out of her parent’s home at odd hours to meet up with people who were way older than she was or with guys who were popular touts in the area we used to live in. Soon, one of our other friends noticed that this girl would have the finest clothes, the most expensive phones, made the best hairs and would take us all out and foot the bills. She started begging to be allowed to follow the other lady for outings and she refused. Now, this wasn’t because she just wanted to be selfish. However, it was simply because she knew that what she was doing was wrong and didn’t want her friend to join her in it.
Peer pressure occurs and affects both genders. That is the reason ladies will go to the ends of the earth to buy clothes and hairs that are way past their budget or even income. It’s the reason why people buy expensive phones that they can’t even use just so that they can take good pictures like the people they see online and other places. It’s the reason why guys would rather invest their time in fraudulent activities because their roommate just bought a car and they are tired of hitching rides to class.
Peer pressure doesn’t even come with force sometimes. Most of the times, you become gradually convinced that you need to be like your peers if you aren’t having sex with different people on a daily, you aren’t among the trend. If you haven’t cheated on your wife with a younger girl in school, you don’t know what is going on. If you haven’t travelled to Dubai for shopping, you are not among the big ladies. I know what you are thinking. Yes, even our parents are victims of peer pressure. That’s one of the reasons most of our parents want to work their butt off and do things they aren’t even fine with. It’s because, they are fighting to meet up with their “mates”.
When people around you do things that aren’t right and you still stay with them, you’ll soon find out that in no time, you will be influenced to be like them and whether you like it or not, bad company corrupts good manners. If your friends aren’t influencing to be a better person, then, they aren’t your friends. Some of the signs that you are being pressured by your peers include:
1. Behaviour changes. Especially around a certain set of people. You suddenly realize that your hair should be flipped to the side instead of the tight bun you already packed at home just because this really beautiful girl in school walks around with her hair flipped and she gets all the attention that you dreaming of. You suddenly have the urge to curse at people and fake smiles around some other people too.
2. You really want to try new things. You know that you can’t deal with the smell of alcohol because it makes you sneeze and feel fuzzy but, when your guys are taking some vodka shots, you can’t possibly be taking soda right? So, just lie to yourself a little bit and take the vodka. Don’t worry, its fine. The sneezing isn’t because of the alcohol. It’s just something about the environment that is triggering it. Right?
3. Now, you just realized that your fashion sense isn’t really chic. You now want to wear ripped jeans even when you don’t feel comfortable with them and its cool if you wear that see-through blouse you bought the other day. You know you don’t want this but, you just can’t keep wearing boring outfits when everybody else is looking like they just jumped out of Vogue magazine.
4. Finally, you have started making comparisons. Everything must be compared now. Your blue jeans isn’t as shiny as your friend’s and your pink lipstick feels a little bit faded while Mahra’s own looks like she was once a Barbie princess.
Don’t worry about how you feel reading this. At least, you’re being true to yourself that you are doing so many things now because you feel pressured by your friends to do so. Listed below are some tips on how to deal with peer pressure and live your own life:
1. Learn how to calmly say no to invitations that you know aren’t good for you. Be assertive.
2. If your clique is trying to bully you into stuff you really don’t want to do, talk to someone older and much more sensible.
3. Be careful when selecting your friends. Very careful. Look for those people who think and act like you.
4. You should go with your guts. A lot of us underestimate the power of our own instinct. There’s that beautiful voice in your head saying you shouldn’t go clubbing with those boys today. Don’t.
5. Finally, I hope you understand that it’s better for you to be alone than to be in the midst of people you have to pretend to be happy with. I always tell my friends that their mental health is more important than anybody’s feeling towards them. I’m telling you this same thing and I hope you understand it. Have a lovely day.
